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You’re stuck in a dead-end job. You want to figure out your next career move. Because you’re gay, it’s important to make a wise decision. You don’t want to end up in a hostile work environment that that doesn’t support diversity.
You go online to find a career coach. You contact a man who says he’d love to work with you. He says he can help take your career further. The cost: $300 a month, for two 30-minute calls. The deal sounds great. You sign on the dotted line.
On the day you decide to come out to your coach, he tells you how he’s active in his church – which turns out to be a fundamentalist denomination that you know has no tolerance for the gay community. Now you’re disappointed. You’ve made a mistake.
Unfortunately, the scenario plays out often as unsuspecting lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender professionals try to make significant transformations in their lives. Coaching can make major transformations possible. But you must do your homework. Not all coaches are accepting of the GLBT community. 
The impact of coaching
In recent years, coaching has become popular. According to Fast Company magazine, up to 40% of Fortune 500 companies hire coaches to improve their organizations. A 2001 study by the Manchester Review found that the outcomes of executives involved in coaching programs averaged nearly 5.7 times higher than the initial investment.
It’s vital to have some basic understanding of a coaching relationship.
What is coaching?
Coaching is a conversation – a dialogue between a coach and a coachee – that is focused on achieving results. Whether it’s learning how to communicate better, balance multiple priorities, or make effective presentations, coaching involves helping people understand their strengths and then identify what’s needed for them to take on new competencies.
There are several types of coaching:
Life coaching focuses on bringing about life-transforming experiences. Examples: creating personal joy and freedom, developing a better sense of self, or learning to let go of personal fears and doubts. For someone in the GLBT community, coaching can include how to come out to your friends and family, and being comfortable with your sexuality.
Business coaching addresses the issues in running a business. Business coaches help you clarify your vision and provide you with the roadmap to get there. If you’re gay, the issues might include how “out” to be at work or to your customers.
Executive coaching builds a collaborative, individualized relationship between an executive and a coach. The aims: to inspire sustained behavioral change and to transform the quality of the executive's professional life.
CHOOSING THE RIGHT COACH
Coaching is not a new concept. The industry attracts business consultants, therapists, and people with good intentions. But there’s no regulatory board or set of standards for coaching. So choose your coach carefully.
Evaluate their credentials
A business coach should have formal training. They should have some understanding of organizational dynamics and how to navigate corporate culture. A life coach should have training in psychology.
You should find out what organizations the coach belongs to, whether or not they publish, teach, or offer other products and services. But don’t take degrees and certifications at face value. They tell you nothing about coaching quality.
Evaluate how the coach works
There are many organizational consultants that call themselves coaches. But all they do is give their expertise and direct you toward the answers. They don’t involve you in the solution. That’s not coaching. A skilled coach will provide you with new ways of looking at issues and will ultimately let you make decisions.
The coach provides support to enhance the skills, resources, and creativity that you already have.
See if they’ve been in your shoes
If you want to hire a coach to help you with coming-out issues, make sure your coach speaks your language.
I’ve been openly gay since age 12. I dealt with coming out at AT&T, at the start of the AIDS crisis. I know what it’s like to deal with the implications and repercussions of being openly gay in the corporate world. Even though companies may have a policy against discrimination, it’s not always safe to come out. My last job, prior to starting my own company, had a hostile work environment. They avoided me. The company president always asked other managers about their weekends, but never asked me.
For someone who isn’t gay, they’d say that they were respecting my privacy. That’s untrue. It’s the silence in organizational dynamics that creates tension in your workplace. Someone who isn’t gay wouldn’t know what that feels like.
Make sure you learn as much about the coach as you can. See if they’re comfortable working with someone who’s gay. A good coach will be honest with you.
Look for testimonials and get real referrals
Most coaches will post either a client list or testimonials on their website. Beware of the coach who puts out a lot of testimonials with no identities attached.
A professional coach who takes their practice seriously will offer you names and phone numbers of clients to contact. Call them. Ask specific questions:
· What was it like to be coached by this person?
· Did they help you achieve your goals?
· Would you hire this coach again?
Make sure you and your coach fit
It’s important to trust your instincts when choosing your coach. If you’re gay, you want someone who markets to the gay community or who may be openly gay themselves.
Ultimately, you want a coach with whom you have great rapport. You want a coach who you’d trust with details of your life.
By asking the right questions, you will hopefully find the coach who will support you toward making truly positive changes in your life.
This article is written by Jim Jenkins, an openly gay consultant, is a certified professional coach, owner of Creative Visions Consulting and co-founder of Innovative Play LLC in Frederick, MD. He specializes in partnering with executives, managers, sales people and lesbian and gay professionals who are committed to creating sustained success in their lives and in their businesses. He’s also the author of the forthcoming book OUT IN THE MARKETPLACE. For more information visit http://www.cvc-inc.com.
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